IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5

IELTS Essay Sample Band 5

5.0
Overall Score
13 Jul 24, 11:37
Want to practice?
Try this question

Overall Feedback

The essay addresses the question but lacks coherence and has numerous grammatical errors. Vocabulary usage is adequate but could be more varied and precise. The essay could benefit from better organization and clearer thesis statement.

Overall score5.0
Grammatical range and accuracy4.0
Lexical resource5.0
Coherence & cohesion5.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors53
Grammatical range and accuracy28
Lexical resource16
Coherence & cohesion4
Task response5
Question
Advancements in technology have transformed various aspects of sports, from performance analysis to equipment design.
How has technology influenced sports, and does it affect the fairness of competitions?
#Sport
#Direct Question
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:240
Paragraphs:4
Word Count Requirement
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Missing Linking Devices
Thesis Statement
in this modern life,
technology
has influenced sports in many ways.
Technology
plays a big part in advancement
of of
sport.
with
technology
a
lot
of improvements
has
been applied to sports.
sport has experienced
a
lot
of improvements
in their system, fairness, and in their
performance
analysis.
if
we talk about 50 decades from now, there
was
not a proper analytics tools to measure their
athelete
performances
, there
wes
still using conventional tools back in the day.
however
, these
days
sports are using more advanced tools in order to know how good their
atheletes
is
. there are a
lot
of devices that commonly
atheletes
are using to watch their
performance
, for
instances
, Garmin. Garmin is a smartwatch that focusing on
people
sport
performances
.
it
has accurate
heartrate
, Vo2max, sleep quality and many more.
in modern football, FIFA is more aware of
advancement
of
technology
to
reducing
unfairness in every game.
one
of a way that FIFA has applied to football
game
these days is VAR (Virtual Assist Referee). VAR
are helping
a
refferees
all over the world to choose the right decision if there is a foul in a football game, it has a
lot
of cameras, sensors, and playback videos.
furthermore
, it is reducing unfairness of
refferees
and
it taking
a big part
of
fairness in competition
overall,
technology
has helped and influenced sports
with
positive ways.
it
obviously
reduing
of unfairness in
sport
competiton
because of
technology
.