IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 6
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 6
6.0
Overall Score
13 Mar 25, 04:17
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Overall Feedback
The essay provides a clear opinion and some examples, but it lacks depth in idea development and contains several grammatical errors. Improved coherence and a more formal tone would enhance the overall quality.
| Overall score | 6.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 6.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 6.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 33 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 4 | |
| Lexical resource | 19 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 6 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Writing Task
#Media & Advertising
#Agree / Disagree
Global advertising campaigns are often accused of promoting a homogenized culture by diminishing local traditions and values.
Do you agree or disagree that global advertising campaigns contribute to cultural homogenization?
Submitted Answer
Words293|Paragraphs4
English:
Global Issues:
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Paragraph 1 Issues:
Missing Linking Devices
Thesis Statement
advertisting
campaigns
contribute to cultural
homgenization
to some degree atleast
but putting the blame solely on such campaigns
might not be the right call. These camapigns
are focused towards the general public
and that is why they must be homogenized to remian
acceptable for different cultures
. In various countries, people have various traditions, what is common for one might not be acceptable for the others. Keeping this view in mind, we can say that without the homogenization the advertising campaigns
can only be focused on specific regions and if such campaigns
are adapted for a global audience
they might face a lot of backlash.Paragraph 2 Issues:
Missing Linking Devices
campaigns
usually have a set budget, incorporating all the possible cultures
within the campaign
is
usually not possible for a marketing department without causing a stirr
. To remain acceptable for a larger audience these campaigns
usually take the safer route of appealing to the general public rather than taking a focused approach to represent a particular culture
. This might not be the best thing from a cultural
prespective
but is the most feasible option for most companies.Paragraph 3 Issues:
Missing Linking Devices
cultural
values have diminished significantly. The cultural
homogenization across the globe is much more a result of natural selection. In the past, Egyptians had a culture
of mumifying
their deceased but even most traditional Egytians donont
consider it appropriate during the current times. There are numerous such examples across the globe.In
conculsion
, with time cultures
evolve, good things are adapted by a wider audience while we let go of the bad ones. The globlal
cultural
homogneization
is not solely the result of global advertisting
campaigns
but is the result of various other factors as well.