IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 6
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 6
6.0
Overall Score
12 Mar 25, 05:01
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Overall Feedback
The essay provides a balanced view of the advantages and disadvantages of video games, but lacks a clear thesis statement and could improve coherence. Grammar and vocabulary are generally accurate, though there are some informal expressions and minor errors that affect the overall band score.
| Overall score | 6.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 6.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 6.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 35 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5 | |
| Lexical resource | 23 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 3 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Writing Task
#Entertainment
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Video games are a prevalent form of entertainment that span a range of genres and platforms, attracting a diverse audience worldwide.
Examine the advantages and disadvantages of playing video games.
Submitted Answer
Words362|Paragraphs5
English:
Global Issues:
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Paragraph 1 Issues:
Thesis Statement
Video
games
have been a large part of many peoples
' childhoods
and have been a part of mine too. I grew up playing
a lot
of video
games
and it was an incredible experience
. A lot
of people
, especially professional gamers
always have a small percentage of people
that dislike them for what they do. They tell them to get off their gaming
chairs and do something more useful with their time. While it is easy to associate video
games
with wasting time, it is also easy to overlook its benefits. Video
games
can actually improve one's brain function. A lot
of hand-eye coordination is needed while playing
some games
. This can improve one's reflexes.Playing
a video
game
is like watching a really good
movie. You play
as the main character and get to see the story unfold. Exactly like a movie but better. It's
such an immersive experience
. Some of the stories are just beautiful. They can leave a deep impression on you. One such example is "Ghost of Tsushima". Everything about the game
is terrific. The visuals, the voice acting, the gameplay, the story are
all top notch
. So yes, gaming
can be an otherworldly experience
.But, it does have some downsides. Many
people
, especially kids, indulge themselves in gaming
and forget about the reality around them. A lot
of people
also indulge in gaming
because they're
lonely. They don't
have many people
they can talk to or don't
like the way things are in their lives. Gaming
serves as an escape.This
shouldn't
be the case. People
shouldn't
use gaming
to escape from lonliness
. It's
easier said than done but
it's
true. Some games
can put a lot
of stress on the individual. This is another con about gaming
. Some games
also require players to spend actual money. I
don't
think
that
's
a wise way to spend one's money.Overall,
gaming
if done right, can be an incredible experience
. I think more people
should recognize the value of video
games
and should give themselves a chance to see just how amazing they can be.