IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 7

IELTS Essay Sample Band 7

7.0
Overall Score
14 Aug 24, 10:17
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Overall Feedback

The essay is well-structured and addresses the question effectively, demonstrating a good balance between traditional and modern values. Minor improvements could be made in idea development and coherence to achieve a higher score.

Overall score7.0
Grammatical range and accuracy8.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response7.0
Total Errors35
Grammatical range and accuracy2
Lexical resource7
Coherence & cohesion23
Task response3
Question
As societies evolve, there is often a tension between maintaining traditional values and embracing new, modern perspectives. This balance is crucial for social harmony and progression.
Discuss the importance of traditional values and the need to adopt modern values in today's society.
#Society
#Discussion
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:301
Paragraphs:22
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Missing Linking Devices
Traditional
Values vs. Modern Perspectives: A Delicate Balance
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The dynamic interplay between
traditional
values
and
modern
perspectives is a cornerstone of societal evolution. Both forces are essential for a harmonious and progressive
society
.
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The Enduring Significance of
Traditional
Values
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Traditional
values
, often rooted in cultural, religious, or familial customs, provide a
society
with a strong foundation. They
instill
a sense of identity, belonging, and continuity. Key benefits of
traditional
values
include:
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Social cohesion: Shared
values
foster a sense of community and cooperation.
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Moral compass:
Traditional
ethics often provide guidelines for
behavior
and decision-making.
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Stability: Established norms and practices contribute to societal stability.
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Preservation of heritage: Traditions help transmit cultural legacy to future generations.
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The Imperative of Modern
Values
As
societies
progress, new challenges and opportunities emerge.
Modern
values
, driven by factors like globalization, technology, and social
change,
are essential for addressing these developments. Key aspects of
modern
values
include:
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Inclusivity: Embracing diversity and equality.
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Progress: Fostering innovation and development.
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Individualism: Recognizing personal rights and freedoms.
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Global citizenship: Promoting interconnectedness and responsibility.
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Finding the Equilibrium
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The key to a thriving
society
lies in harmonizing
traditional
and
modern
values
.
Here's how:
Selective adaptation: Choose which
traditional
values
are still relevant and adapt them to contemporary contexts.
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Respectful dialogue: Encourage open conversations about differing perspectives.
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Education: Promote understanding of both
traditional
and
modern
values
.
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Leadership: Strong leadership can guide the integration of these
values
.
For instance, a
society
might uphold
traditional
family
values
while also embracing
modern
concepts of gender equality and work-life balance. Or, a community can preserve its cultural heritage while adopting sustainable practices to address environmental challenges.
In conclusion,
traditional
and
modern
values
are not mutually exclusive but complementary forces. A
society
that successfully navigates this complex landscape can achieve a harmonious blend of stability, progress, and inclusivity.