IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5
5.0
Overall Score
12 Nov 24, 18:06
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Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the task but lacks depth in discussing measures to mitigate inequalities. Grammar errors and spelling mistakes affect clarity, while coherence is hindered by awkward phrasing. Vocabulary is adequate but lacks variety.
| Overall score | 5.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 4.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5.0 | |
| Task response | 5.0 |
| Total Errors | 55 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 10 | |
| Lexical resource | 36 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
Urbanization can exacerbate social inequalities, creating disparities in access to resources, services, and opportunities among urban dwellers.
What social inequalities arise from urbanization, and what measures can be taken to mitigate these inequalities?
#Urbanization
#Direct Question
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:321
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
generates
due to the urbanization is a well know
socail
concern. In my opinion, education
, and transport are main sectors that have inequalities in most cities
, and number of students who enter higher education
, and time duration of traveling
certain distance in different ares
are best
measurements for mitigating these inequalties
.Different
catagories
for secondary schools
has been generated via the proccess
of urbanization. For instant
, the schools
in most developed cities
follow the curriculum directly related to the higher education
, matching to the university entrance. But schools
in under developed
areas
basically forcus
on vocational trainings, and life skills, as schools
lack much reourses
such as
modern laboratoriers
, to teach parallel to higher education
level. A study conducted at Modern University of Dubai in 2020 has demonstrated that
schools
situated closer to the capital of the
city
showed best results in
advanceed
level examination than those who are learned at
schools
, few
killometes
away from the
city
.
Secondly, transport has made significant inequalities among urban
dweellers
, as urbainaztion
plans for transpotation
are not similar in all areas
. The trnaspotation
sytems
are depend
on geograpical
locations and level population in the city
. Since, more people prefer to live closer specific
ares
, such as
industrial areas
, public transpotation
in those areas
well developed
with different modes of travelling
such as
trains, buses and shuttle services. Comparativelly
, less occupied ares
has one of these systems. As an example, the ministry area
of the Muscat city
has properly shedulled
train and bus sevice
, while other area
of the city
has
no public transpotation
, only taxi service. Therefore, travelling
in ministry
area
is less time consuming
than other ares
of the city
.In my opinion, even though urbanization is
perfect
concept for developing cities
in a country, govenment
should make sure the equal distribution of resources all over the city
, in order to prevent discrimination.