IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5

IELTS Essay Sample Band 5

5.0
Overall Score
08 Aug 24, 09:37
Want to practice?
Try this question

Overall Feedback

The essay addresses the role of education in promoting cultural awareness but lacks depth and clarity. Grammar and vocabulary usage are basic, and the essay could benefit from better coherence and more developed ideas.

Overall score5.0
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource5.0
Coherence & cohesion5.0
Task response5.0
Total Errors28
Grammatical range and accuracy5
Lexical resource12
Coherence & cohesion6
Task response5
Question
Education systems have the potential to play a significant role in promoting cultural awareness and sensitivity through the integration of comprehensive cultural studies.
What is the role of education in promoting cultural awareness, and how should cultural studies be integrated into educational systems?
#Culture
#Direct Question
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:220
Paragraphs:3
Word Count Requirement
Paragraph Count Requirement
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
The role of
education
in promoting cultural awareness is that they
are
the gateway
to
student from
various
communities to receive and socialize with
eachother
.
Education
, in simple terms, school provided the students from
various
different
background
to
enroll
and study in the same environment with students from different
background
as their peers. In this light, it is important how educators should invest their time and energy in providing the necessary
education
to their
pupils
.
Education
started
to become the standard in many parts of the world
starting
from the end of the 20th century, and people from
various
background
who seeks better living conditions elsewhere
starting
to come to places metropolitan area like the United States and first-world country.
This has created the need to
intergrate
the culture and create a some sort of dialogue between the
various
communities to create a some sort of harmony and
peacefullness
.
Missing Linking Devices
There are several known ways on how educators should give their cultural studies to their
pupils
. Many schools in the United States
has
started
a sort of cultural festival to
gave
their mixed-
background
pupils
a way to introduce their heritage and personal culture. The benefit of doing festivals like this is that the
pupils
may have become
accostumed
and hopefully reduced their ignorance and stigma of others around them.