IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5

IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5

5.0
Overall Score
13 Nov 24, 10:31
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Overall Feedback

The essay addresses the task but lacks a clear personal opinion and examples, affecting task achievement. Grammar and vocabulary are basic, with some repetition and errors, while coherence and cohesion could be improved with better organization and transitions.
Overall score5.0
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource5.0
Coherence & cohesion5.0
Task response5.0
Total Errors21
Grammatical range and accuracy4
Lexical resource6
Coherence & cohesion4
Task response7
Question
In most developed countries shopping is not only about buying the goods you need, it is also perceived as entertainment.
Is it a positive or negative development? Give your own opinion and examples based on your experience.
#Entertainment
#Direct Question
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:209
Paragraphs:3
Word Count Requirement
Paragraph Count Requirement
Opinion Required
Example Required
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
The perception of
shopping
as a form of entertainment in develop countries brings both positive and negative. Viewing
shopping
as
form
of entertainment can be negative because it
effect
the economics.
When
shopping
becomes a recreational activity,
people
are most likely buy items impulsively and
ended
up caring less about the benefit of the product they buy. Shopping for entertainment can lead individuals to spend beyond their means, accumulating debt, especially with the easy access to credit cards and buy-now-pay-later options.
People
may end up prioritizing the excitement of purchasing over
financial
responsibility, leading to stress and even long-term
financial
issues. Shopping as a hobby can cause
people
to spend money they
don’t
have, especially with easy access to credit cards and payment plans. This can lead to debt and
financial
stress, which can affect their long-term
financial
well-being. Recreational
shopping
increases demand for items like fast fashion and gadgets, which are often made using unsustainable practices. This adds to problems like deforestation, water pollution, and greenhouse gas emissions.
In short, while shopping for fun can be enjoyable, it also has serious downsides. Being more thoughtful about
shopping
could help
people
avoid unnecessary spending and reduce the negative effects on the planet.

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