IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5
IELTS Essay Sample Band 5
5.0
Overall Score
27 Jun 24, 11:00
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Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the question but lacks clarity and coherence. Grammar and vocabulary need improvement, and ideas should be more logically developed and supported with examples.
| Overall score | 5.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 4.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5.0 | |
| Task response | 5.0 |
| Total Errors | 36 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 11 | |
| Lexical resource | 18 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 3 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
Despite the known benefits of physical activities, many educational institutions struggle to adequately promote sports among students.
What problems do schools face in promoting sports, and how can these be addressed?
#Sport
#Problem / Solution
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:272
Paragraphs:5
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
a physical activities
established inadvance
for students
experience worldwide. However, various individuals is
not willing to do sport which provide new challanges
as school or, educational institution face issues on engaging typical student
on their motive. This essay will include on why this occasion might occur and path to facillitate
the problem such as, compact schedule students
currently have on their personal educational life, or waste their limited time on online
games
.Educational life has been crucial for
youngsters
and create challanges
to accomodate
both at the same period. Lisa, a student
counselor
, stated that highschoolers
has their though years applaying
to top university. Therefore, they prefer prioritize
their future education
which requires high effort.Studying is a key to reach top university. However, numerous of young generation has been addicted to
online
games
. This statement has been fully justified throughout wikipedia
as 80% of teenagers play mobile games
. Moreover, these action has leads to cautious habits as sports maintain to be their second priority.As education and
online
game
addiction maintain as a cause, sports should be numerously promoted throughout developing school sports club
. This method could be sucessful
thoughout
sports certificate that could facillitate
students
on applying world best education aside from report scores. In additional, school
could encourage their students
throughout
setting up seminars regard
the benefits of exercising as they could improve teens
well being
and strength. These procedures could highly provide advantages for learners.As a conclusion, sport might be less interesting due to
students
prioritize studying among exercising and the rise of young online
game
players. Therefore, we should promote teenagers of advantage perspective.