IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 6.5

IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6.5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 6.5

6.5
Overall Score
26 Sept 24, 07:16
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Overall Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the task with clear arguments and relevant examples. However, there are some grammatical errors and occasional awkward phrasing that affect readability and coherence.
Overall score6.5
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource7.0
Coherence & cohesion7.0
Task response7.0
Total Errors22
Grammatical range and accuracy11
Lexical resource5
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response3
Question
Cultural expression and preservation are often supported by government funding for the arts, museums, and historical preservation.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of allocating government spending to support arts and culture.
#Government Spending
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:309
Paragraphs:5
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Some
people
contend that there are many pressing concerns that a country must resolve before putting emphasis on the
arts
. However, I personally think that
arts
are an essential part of a culture, and it is quite fair to allocate funds to preserve and develop
arts
.
Admittedly, there are some justifications
by
people
who oppose spending on promoting
arts
. First of all, most
art
projects are expensive with no obvious outcomes that have direct relations to a nation’s income. For example, the monument of
Kebangkitan
Pahlawan in Malang city that adsorbed almost 1 billion rupiahs does not attract
people
that much. Besides,
art
is not a critical aspect of the sustainability of human’s
life
. Human’s
life
will not disappear just because they have less taste of aesthetics.
However, I still support that the government should allocate a budget for the
arts
.
Arts
are part of a culture
and
over
time
become the identity of a nation, eventually,
arts
could be a major source of income for them. For instance, Bali is an island in Indonesia, where millions of visitors come each year to experience the combination of conventional values and modern lifestyles. The government in Indonesia invests more than a third of its budget to maintain its traditional
arts
.
Furthermore,
art
makes a
life
worth living. Like food,
art
is a supplement for the human soul. It has a magnificent power to aid buildings, roads, parks, and everything, with its uniqueness. Just imagine how empty a room would be if there is no painting or decoration on the wall!
Art
is enhancing
people
’s
life
by leveraging their experiences and empowering
people
to possess beautiful imaginations.
To conclude, supporting
arts
is important for a government as it would enhance the quality of
life
either by improving the tourism industry or by providing a better artistic facility.

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