IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6

IELTS Essay Sample Band 6

6.0
Overall Score
27 Jun 24, 21:44
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Overall Feedback

The essay addresses the task but lacks depth in argumentation and examples. Grammar and vocabulary are adequate but could be more varied and accurate. Coherence and cohesion are present but could be improved with better transitions and structure.

Overall score6.0
Grammatical range and accuracy6.0
Lexical resource5.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors25
Grammatical range and accuracy4
Lexical resource14
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response4
Question
Some people believe that what children watch on television influences their behaviour. Others say that the amount of time spent watching television influences their behaviour.
Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
#Media & Advertising
#Discussion
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:323
Paragraphs:4
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
Some people argue that
watching
television
can cause a negative
impact
for their
kids
, while other people believe that
educational
purposes for their
kids
is from
watching
television
as a positive source. In my opinion, it depends on what
type of
programs
that they present for their
kids
to
learn
from
watching
TV. From those statements, it will be discussed as an agreement
on
this essay.
My first opinion,
watching
television
is not a problem for
kids
, unless several
programs
from the
television
will
give
a good
impact
for their
educational
purposes. For instance, their parents
give
plenty of time for their
kids
to
watch
and
learn
about the alphabet from the
television
program
. Somehow, several children use their visual sense to understand that, so it is easier as a fast learner to
learn
from the
television
and
give
a positive
impact
for their
educational
purposes. However,
television
can
give
a chance to disabled children with eye problems to
learn
by hearing the sound from
television
.
Another opinion,
television
can
give
more
information
about this world.
National geographic
as an example for this statement. This
program
includes all the species and wildlife or nature, which is proper to create meaningful
information
. Rather than having to go there to see the species, we can use the
television
to get to know more. All the
programs
that are served on
television
mostly are important and will
give
the audience entertaining and impactful
information
especially for
kids
with lots of questions in their lives.
Watching
television
for their
kids
is not
giving
them a bad
impact
, as long as their parents can control what type of
television
program
for their
kids
. It is better to
give
them an
educational
program
than a cartoon
program
, maybe it does not
give
them insight about
learning
. Several
programs
such as
national geographic
can also help children to understand and get the
information
about wildlife and nature in this world.