IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5

IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5

5.0
Overall Score
17 Mar 25, 04:42
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Overall Feedback

The essay addresses the task but lacks depth in argumentation and contains numerous grammatical errors. Improved coherence and a wider range of vocabulary would enhance the overall quality of the essay.
Overall score5.0
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource5.0
Coherence & cohesion5.0
Task response5.0
Total Errors49
Grammatical range and accuracy18
Lexical resource23
Coherence & cohesion4
Task response4

Writing Task

#Government Spending
#Direct Question
Public health continues to be a critical sector that requires substantial investment.
How important is it for the government to invest in healthcare? Should the government increase its financial commitment to public health?

Submitted Answer

Words332|Paragraphs4
English:UK English
Global Issues:
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Paragraph 1 Issues:
Thesis Statement
Social
health remains to be an alarming sector that needs investment in order to improve. Many
people
believe that it is
extremely
important
to dedicate extra money towards
healthcare
.
Therefore
,
government
ought to increase
investemnts
and improve public health.
Affordable
healthcare
is a sign of a thriving
country
. The main
responsability
of the
governmnet
is to take care of their
people
,
therefore
they should devote time to
improve
healthcare
. According to
staticts
, some
people
would rather suffer in pain than visit a doctor. To be clear, the reason behind it is not that they are scared of the doctors, the truth is that they
cant
afford a
medical
treatment. In some
countries
, namely The United
States
the cost of insurance is extremely high, which leads to pricey
medical
check-ups.
Therefore
, It is
important
for the
government
to invest money
for
healthcare
and create
a good
social
countries
, where everyone
are
entitled
for
a good free
healtcare
. Additionally, building new hospitals,
medical
building
and investing in
medical
research is as
important
as providing affordable health.
Moreover, this essay
ageers
that every
country
should increase theirs financial commitment to public
healthcare
. As we have stated before,
an alarming prices
of
healtcare
should be the
government
responsability
. Furthermore, in almost every
country
people
are forced to pay taxes, which goes directly to the
government
.
Speding
more percents from the taxes on the
healthcare
could be a great way of decreasing the prices and making it more available for everyone. For instance,
countries
in Europe, namely Norway and
Sweden
should be
a prime examples
for
a great functioning
healthcare
and should
motivates
other
countries
how
to became
better
social
country
.
Public
healthcare
is considered to be a critical sector and investment is more than crucial. It is
important
for
govenment
to invest in
healtcare
by making it more
afforable
as well as building new hospitals.
Government
should spend more money
towards
health and get inspired by
social
countries
, where
healthcare
is at its peak level.

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