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IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 7

IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 7 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 7

7.0
Overall Score
23 Apr 25, 15:58
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Overall Feedback

The essay provides a balanced discussion of globalization's impact on employment, with clear examples and a logical structure. However, it could benefit from more varied vocabulary and a clearer thesis statement to enhance coherence and task achievement.
Overall score7.0
Grammatical range and accuracy7.0
Lexical resource7.0
Coherence & cohesion7.0
Task response7.0
Total Errors13
Grammatical range and accuracy2
Lexical resource4
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response4

Writing Task

#Globalisation
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Globalisation has created numerous employment opportunities through outsourcing and multinational operations, yet it has also led to job displacement and insecurity for many workers.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of globalisation in terms of employment.

Submitted Answer

Words288|Paragraphs4
English:US English
Global Issues:
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Paragraph 1 Issues:
Thesis Statement
Several employment opportunities have been created since the dawn of globalization but has also led to the displacement and job instability for many individuals around the
world
. Thus, in order to further understand the importance of globalization, it is important to determine the advantages and disadvantages of the phenomenon.
As
countries
around the
world
begin to become more
inter-connected
with one another, people started to welcome the option of working in other
countries
. This is the primary advantage of
globalization
as professionals in third-
world
countries
have the opportunity to study or work in more developed
countries
in pursuit of a better quality of life. Moreover, globalization has been an effective catalyst for industries to expand, creating jobs for more individuals. An example of this is the relatively recent boom of the technological industry that enabled aggressive economic production and growth for many
countries
.
On the other hand, globalization has not given the best outcomes for everyone. As first-
world
countries
start to welcome an increasing number of immigrants or workers from other
countries
, specific professions are becoming more competitive as time passes. At the same time, those without means of moving to another
country
are left living in conditions that are less than ideal, with a wage that can barely get them by. This is the case for many nurses in the Philippines who are financially incapable of moving abroad for a better life and are thus, stuck in their
country
working for less than minimum wage.
With all of these things considered, it can be concluded that globalization has brought an abundance of opportunities for people all over the
world
. However, the poor and marginalized are still left behind, having to suffer its negative effects.

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