IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5.5

IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5.5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5.5

5.5
Overall Score
22 Jun 24, 10:45
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Overall Feedback

The essay addresses the task well, presenting both views and providing a personal opinion. However, it contains several grammatical errors and lacks a clear thesis statement, which affects coherence and readability.
Overall score5.5
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource5.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors47
Grammatical range and accuracy17
Lexical resource23
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response4
Question
Scientists agree that people are damaging their health by eating too much junk food. Some people think that the answer to this problem is to educate people. Others think education will not work.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
#Food
#Discussion
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:345
Paragraphs:5
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
Scientists comply that , by eating
junk
food
in
excess
amoumt
can harm
people
's health. Few
people
contemplate that the solution to this problem is to literate
people
about it, on the other
hand
some
individuals
does
not agree with it. In this
essay
we will try
elaborate
and compare both view points and personal opinion as well with examples.
Prominents of
education
argues
that informing
poeple
about
disadvantages
of
junk
food
and
benifits
of a
healthy
diet can lead to a
healthy
choice
and
eventually outcome will be overall a
healthy
life style
.
Education
initiatives can raise awareness about the
long term
health issues associated with
junk
food
such as obesity , heart decease , and diabetes. By
incorparating
nutritions
education
in school
curriculm
and public campaigns,
individuals
can get a
better
understanding of how to
make
healthier
choices
.
However, critics of this approach argue that
education
alone is insufficient to
combact
the
junk
food
epidemic. They point out that the knowledge alone does not translate to
behavior
change. Many
people
are aware of
repercrussion
associated with
junk
food
, with that
said
people
continue to consume
junk
food
due to factors such as convenience, affordability and taste preference.
Junk
food
is often more
accessable
and
cheaper then
healthier
alternatives
which
make
that a practical
choise
specially
for the
people
with limited financial resources.
In my opinion, while
education
is a crucial component of
addressing
the
junk
food
problem, it should be part of a multifaceted approach.
Education
can lay the foundation for
healthier
eating habits, but it needs to be supported by structural changes that
make
healthy
food
choices
more accessible and appealing. Governments should implement policies that reduce the availability and attractiveness of
junk
food
while promoting
healthier
alternatives. For instance, imposing taxes on sugary drinks and high
calories
food
making
companies.
In conclusion,
addressing
the public health issue of
junk
food
consumption requires a combination of
education
and policy interventions. While educating
individuals
about nutrition is essential, it must be complemented by measures that
address
the economic and environmental factors driving unhealthy eating habits.

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