IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 7.5
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 7.5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 7.5
7.5
Overall Score
28 Sept 24, 15:36
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Overall Feedback
The essay effectively addresses the question, providing clear arguments and examples. It demonstrates strong grammar and vocabulary usage, though the logical flow and idea development could be slightly more refined for a perfect score.
| Overall score | 7.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 9.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 6.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 7.0 | |
| Task response | 7.0 |
| Total Errors | 20 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 0 | |
| Lexical resource | 13 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 4 | |
| Task response | 3 |
Question
Peer pressure can greatly influence the behavior of young people, potentially leading to criminal activities.
How significant is the influence of peer pressure in contributing to youth crime, and what interventions can society implement to mitigate this?
#Youth Crime
#Direct Question
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:307
Paragraphs:6
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Peer
pressure
is a powerful force in shaping the behavior
of young people, often leading them to engage in criminal activities
. During adolescence, individuals are particularly vulnerable to the influence of their peers
, as the desire for acceptance and belonging can outweigh personal values and judgments. For example, a teenager may feel compelled to join friends in shoplifting to gain approval, even if they know it is wrong. This desire to fit in can push them toward behaviors
they might otherwise avoid, such as drug use or vandalism.The significance of
peer
pressure
in contributing to youth
crime cannot be overstated. Research indicates that adolescents are more likely to engage in delinquent behavior
when surrounded by peers
who normalize such actions. For instance, a study showed
that teens who associate with friends involved in gang activities
are significantly more likely to participate in similar behaviors
. The collective mindset of a group can create an environment where criminal activities
seem acceptable, leading to a cycle of offending.To mitigate the negative impacts of
peer
pressure
, society can implement several effective interventions. First, educational programs in schools that focus on decision-making and critical thinking can empower students to resist negative influences. Programs like “Too Good for Drugs” teach youth
how to handle peer
pressure
and make healthier choices.Second, fostering
positive
peer
groups through extracurricular activities
can provide supportive environments. For instance, sports teams and community service initiatives encourage teamwork and create a sense of belonging without resorting to delinquent behavior
.Additionally, mentorship programs that connect at-risk
youth
with positive
role models can offer guidance and support. These mentors can help young people navigate the complexities of peer
dynamics, encouraging them to make positive
choices.Missing Linking Devices
peer
pressure
through education, positive
engagement, and mentorship, society can significantly reduce youth
crime and promote healthier development among adolescents.