IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6

IELTS Essay Sample Band 6

6.0
Overall Score
24 Jul 24, 17:43
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The essay addresses the question but lacks depth in idea development and examples. Grammar and vocabulary are adequate but could be improved for better clarity and coherence.

Overall score6.0
Grammatical range and accuracy6.0
Lexical resource5.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors22
Grammatical range and accuracy3
Lexical resource10
Coherence & cohesion5
Task response4
Question
In many countries, governments spend significant resources on promoting national culture through festivals, museums, and public television programs.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of governments promoting national culture?
#Culture
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:252
Paragraphs:5
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Missing Linking Devices
Thesis Statement
Nowadays,
many
governments around the world believe that they should devote more resources to developing and
promoting
their
culture
through festivals, museums or television programs.
In fact, this
also
brings
efficiency but
also
has
many
potential disadvantages that make
countries
have to consider before taking action.
The major disadvantage of
promoting
national
cultures
is their inaccessibility to certain sections of society. Because the majority of young people today tend to pay little attention to their
country
's
traditional
culture
, have no interest or feel bored. They are influenced by the
culture
of developed
countries
and find it difficult to leave. Next is that
traditional
culture
can face great competition from other, larger
cultures
. A typical example is Korean
culture
that thrives in Asia, especially they know clearly the advantages of their
culture
are movies and music.
However,
promoting
culture
also
brings
many
benefits to the
country
. Specifically,
traditional
beauties will be more accepted and gradually approached by
many
younger generations, promotion through festivals,
museums as well as television
will
bring
a source of revenue that will contribute to the economy.
international
.
In addition, if
promoted
effectively, it will
also
contribute to
bringing
culture
to the world so that every
country
knows about it.
In conclusion, I think the government needs to be cautious when deciding to
promote
its
traditional
cultural heritage, and must be selective to
bring
more benefits than disadvantages to the
country
.
Bringing
culture
to the world will help the
country
develop and
bring
a beautiful image to the
country
.