IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6
IELTS Essay Sample Band 6
6.0
Overall Score
27 Jun 24, 10:22
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The essay addresses the question but lacks depth in argumentation and examples. Grammar and vocabulary are adequate but could be more varied and precise to enhance clarity and coherence.
| Overall score | 6.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 6.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 6.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 6.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 13 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 3 | |
| Lexical resource | 3 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 3 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
Tourism can play a significant role in the economic development of a country, providing jobs and boosting local businesses. However, it can also have detrimental effects on local communities, from cultural dilution to environmental degradation.
How important is tourism for the economy, and what are the negative impacts it can have on local communities?
#Tourism
#Direct Question
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:297
Paragraphs:5
Formality
Task Response
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Thesis Statement
communities
while others think differently. I tend to lean more towards the disadvantages outweighing the advantages.Admittedly, International tourism can help a country with its publicity. This is due to the fact that one of the goals of these businesses is promoting these places and what it has to offer. To further exemplify, major businesses have helped certain developing countries such as the Philippines in terms of exposure to the public eye. As a result, to this, more people are eager to visit which can benefit local communities.
Nevertheless, such trends can still equate to reoccurring problems. For one, Large corporations running the tours in these places tend to take away sales from the small shops in the area. This is because of their ability to bring in a large number of customers which takes away the spotlight from the
homegrown
establishments. This, in return, would lead to multiple outlets in the central area going bankrupt.Furthermore, Certain cultural practices would also feel a sense of discrimination. This phenomenon arises by corporations not highlighting the essence of why they do these
performances
as they are purely driven by greed and profit. An instance would be rewriting displays in hopes to maximize profit. This would then lose the authenticity of the work.In conclusion, even though international tourism can have its perks within the locals, I still continue to stand by the idea of the disadvantages far outweighing the advantages. While it can give locations a boost in terms of the foreign eye, the hard work and the presentations of the local community will unfortunately be overshadowed by the money hungry enterprises.