IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6.5
IELTS Essay Sample Band 6.5
6.5
Overall Score
05 Aug 24, 09:58
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Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the question well, discussing both problems and solutions related to corruption in law enforcement. However, there are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that affect readability and coherence. Vocabulary usage is adequate but could be more varied and precise.
| Overall score | 6.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 7.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 7.0 | |
| Task response | 7.0 |
| Total Errors | 17 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 9 | |
| Lexical resource | 1 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 4 | |
| Task response | 3 |
Question
Corruption within the law enforcement agencies undermines the criminal justice system and erodes public trust.
What problems does corruption within law enforcement cause and what solutions can be proposed to combat this issue?
#Criminal Justice
#Problem / Solution
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:255
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Integrity plays an important role in executing criminal or civil accusation in order to preserve justice for both perpetrators and victims. However,
growing
prevalence of corruptions contributes to unjust verdicts, which leads to an insecurity status in the community; therefore, effective proposals should be implemented to curb this challenge.To begin with, dishonesty in the court results in accusations to the innocents, due to the involvement of underground transactions in the cases. In some circumstances, the accused pays the juries or judges for a lighter sentence, which is unfair to the victims and their families. Consequently, legal department loses the public trust, creating conflicts and instabilities in the society, where people will not be aware of the consequences of their deeds and the nation becomes vulnerable to violence.
In order to tackle this obstacle, the government should provide sufficient salaries to the juries,
polices
and other workers
involving
in the law enforcement, as they are likely to find other alternatives to earn income, if inadequate money is received for their jobs.
For instance, Singapore
government enhance
the living standards of workers in governmental institutions to reduce their motivations to commit degradation. Moreover, legal aid should be provided to the poor accused to provide free legal representation, so that
their right is
protected.In conclusion, backlashes of corruptness are unfair results for citizens and imposing pressure on the societal security. The authorities should pay the official employees well, while encouraging
Pro bono
to help individuals with financial issues, so that a just country will be preserved.