IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5
5.0
Overall Score
15 Oct 24, 13:36
Want to practice this question?
Go to IELTS Essay Checker
Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the task but lacks clarity and coherence, with several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Vocabulary is limited and repetitive, and the argument could be more logically developed with better cohesion between ideas.
| Overall score | 5.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5.0 | |
| Task response | 5.0 |
| Total Errors | 23 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 10 | |
| Lexical resource | 4 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
#Health
#Discussion
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:277
Paragraphs:1
Paragraph Count Requirement
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
because
everyone is more concerned about the good health. People believes that the establishment of sports centre has positive impact on the body, whereas, in contrast other
things that there are other
key
, things will be focused beside it. In this essay, I will be discussing both sides and will be giving logical opinion. It is relevant enough to say that engaging in physical activities have a lot of crucial benefits to our health. We get physically active in games and there is continuous movements
in the body, which is essential to be physically fit. For instance, sports players are seen living longer life
. So if we want to survive more in good health condition, then more sports facilities will be established. On the contrast view, some folks have believed that there are other
criteria need
to be focused because
sports have very low effect on the health. by
meaning other
things they refers
to the environmental conservation. If we work on improving issues such as water, air and noise pollution, we can reduce the number of patient
in the hospital. For example, most of the illness happens because
of drinking of contaminated water. In my opinion, our primary goals will be focused on enhancing the environment in which we live. If we have a hygienic surrounding then our health condition will improve and then only we will be able to engage in sports. To sum up , some believe that introducing more sports facilities help to achieve a good health
, but it's
not enough governments should implement the laws and regulation
to prevent the environment first.