IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 6

IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 6

6.0
Overall Score
19 Jul 24, 03:11
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The essay addresses the task well, discussing both advantages and disadvantages of promoting national culture. However, there are grammatical errors and some issues with coherence and cohesion that affect readability.
Overall score6.0
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors26
Grammatical range and accuracy8
Lexical resource10
Coherence & cohesion4
Task response4
Question
In many countries, governments spend significant resources on promoting national culture through festivals, museums, and public television programs.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of governments promoting national culture?
#Culture
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:287
Paragraphs:1
Paragraph Count Requirement
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
In the globalization era, some traditional
cultures
are threatened to fade in time, hence why, the
governments
have been
spending
more
budget
to promote the
national
identity.
This essay will discuss
both the advantages and disadvantages of
spending
significant resources
for
maintaining
culture
. Recently, the
government
has been planning their
budget
on film festivals, special museum exhibitions, and public television programs with the purpose to
present
their
culture
to a wider audience. This motivates local artists to promote themselves and
imbuing
their traditional roots through their creations. As an example, the
government
spent
a big
budget
to sponsor for local film production to compete in the international film festival. Positively, not only this phenomenon
creates
international awareness of our country, but it also raises the pride of the
national
citizens when their
culture
is being represented internationally. Despite the benefits, there are several disadvantages that may backfire the original purpose. While it is true that it is important to prioritize the popularizing of a
national
identity, however, there are many priorities on the list that
is
neglected. In developing countries, people
suggests
that the economy should be concentrated on the well-being of
citizens
such as combatting poverty, education, and health systems. For instance, Soekarno, the former president of
Indonesia
spent
an enormous
budget
on building historical statues instead of building infrastructure and distributing healthcare for the people. As a result, there was a great
national
dicourse
and increased the
numebr
of oppositions because people were losing their trust in the
government
. In conclusion, while it is crucial to maintain the
national
culture
, there has to be a balance in the amount of resources to be
spent
by the
government
, especially
in regards to
the priority list.

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