IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 6
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 6
6.0
Overall Score
19 Jul 24, 03:11
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Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the task well, discussing both advantages and disadvantages of promoting national culture. However, there are grammatical errors and some issues with coherence and cohesion that affect readability.
Overall score | 6.0 | |
Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
Lexical resource | 6.0 | |
Coherence & cohesion | 6.0 | |
Task response | 6.0 |
Total Errors | 26 | |
Grammatical range and accuracy | 8 | |
Lexical resource | 10 | |
Coherence & cohesion | 4 | |
Task response | 4 |
Question
In many countries, governments spend significant resources on promoting national culture through festivals, museums, and public television programs.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of governments promoting national culture?
#Culture
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:287
Paragraphs:1
Paragraph Count Requirement
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
In the globalization era, some traditional
cultures
are threatened to fade in time, hence why, the governments
have been spending
more budget
to promote the national
identity. This essay will discuss
both the advantages and disadvantages of spending
significant resources for
maintaining culture
. Recently, the government
has been planning their budget
on film festivals, special museum exhibitions, and public television programs with the purpose to present
their culture
to a wider audience. This motivates local artists to promote themselves and imbuing
their traditional roots through their creations. As an example, the government
spent
a big budget
to sponsor for local film production to compete in the international film festival. Positively, not only this phenomenon creates
international awareness of our country, but it also raises the pride of the national
citizens when their culture
is being represented internationally. Despite the benefits, there are several disadvantages that may backfire the original purpose. While it is true that it is important to prioritize the popularizing of a national
identity, however, there are many priorities on the list that is
neglected. In developing countries, people suggests
that the economy should be concentrated on the well-being of citizens
such as combatting poverty, education, and health systems. For instance, Soekarno, the former president of Indonesia
spent
an enormous budget
on building historical statues instead of building infrastructure and distributing healthcare for the people. As a result, there was a great national
dicourse
and increased the numebr
of oppositions because people were losing their trust in the government
. In conclusion, while it is crucial to maintain the national
culture
, there has to be a balance in the amount of resources to be spent
by the government
, especially in regards to
the priority list.