IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6

IELTS Essay Sample Band 6

6.0
Overall Score
17 Aug 24, 20:57
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The essay addresses the question but contains grammatical errors and lacks coherence in some parts. Vocabulary usage is adequate but could be more varied, and the ideas need better development and support.

Overall score6.0
Grammatical range and accuracy6.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors19
Grammatical range and accuracy2
Lexical resource10
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response4
Question
Technology is often hailed as a key driver of efficiency and productivity in the workplace, but it also brings about challenges and potential downsides.
How does technology enhance workplace productivity, and what are its potential negative consequences?
#Technology
#Direct Question
Submitted Answer
English:US English
Words:291
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
In the contemporary era, the pervasive use of
technology
in the workplace has enhanced efficiency and
productivity
throught
the automation of recurring processes. Even though there are positive impacts of innovative advancements in the workplace, these mechanism results in
increased
initial
costs
and higher unemployment rates. This essay will further elaborate on
the how
technology
increases
productivity
, along with its negative consequences.
To begin with, machinery and modern systems help improve efficiency by automating the repetitive procedures, thus raising the production capacity. In the modern era, factors have a multitude of cyclic operations that are time-consuming and require a considerable workforce, thus decreases the effectiveness.
,
robots and sophisticated machinery are better options, as they are faster and more accurate than humans when handling cyclic operations, such as assembly line processes and quality control. Consequently, these improvements
not only promote
productivity
but also
increase
production capacity, as more products can be produced in the same amount of time.
Despite the advantages,
technology
in the workplace raise valid concerns about unemployment and higher upfront
costs
. Since
labour-saving
machines are introduced, firms can get rid of workers and produce more products in the same amount of time. As a result, at both national and international levels, people working in lower-level jobs are losing their jobs rapidly. Moreover, setting up systems like artificial
technology
and robotics involves high fixed
costs
, along with the maintenance expenses, which
increases
the overall operating
costs
for business. Hence, machinery and technical systems can have negative consequences for both business owners and workers.
To conclude, although
technology
is crucial to business success and
productivity
, it still can have drawbacks. With mindfulness and careful scrutiny, a balanced can be struck to achieve more
frutifull
results from technological advancements.