IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5.5
IELTS Essay Sample Band 5.5
5.5
Overall Score
12 Jul 24, 09:45
Want to practice?
Try this question
Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the question but contains several grammatical errors and lacks coherence in some parts. The vocabulary is adequate but could be more varied, and the ideas need better development and support with examples.
| Overall score | 5.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 38 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 14 | |
| Lexical resource | 16 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 4 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that video games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them.
In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits?
#Entertainment
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:296
Paragraphs:4
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
video
games
has
become more popular than ever.People usually play
video
games
to kill their time and take a break from their day-to-day activities. However, these games
and its effects in youths have nowadays been a debatable topic.I do agree that the problems of video
games
can outweigh the benefits.Video
games
developed today not only focuses
on game
and amusement but also covers
educational platforms helping students to uplift their scores. These games
are often creative and motivates
learners to use logical and analytical thinking. Players can spend their free time
in entertaing
video
games
, and can even communicate and socialize with their friends.Video
games
have even promoted youths in e-sports, securing them a platform to earn.With all these advantages comes drawbacks too. Many
researches
have
shown that childrens
who play
fighting video
games
are found agrresive
which clearly shows that it affects our mental health. Screens do not cause eye pain usually
but gamers have to stare at display
continuosly
which does affect our eyes. Many kids are playing
physical games
less frequently because, their games
have been replaced by a digital version
. This is quite a controversial topic as
childrens
are becoming socially as well as physically inactive.Creativity comes in children through all
this
exercies
and physical
games
they
play
but
video
games
have replaced it all and killed the creativity and innocence in
childrens
.
In conclusion, there are several benefits of
video
games
if we use it for good purposes
like for entertainment and educational purposes. But childrens
nowdays
are somewhat addicted to games
and are harming themselves and their creativity.Thus, if they are not utilized in a proper manner, they will cause many harms and can make people dormant.