IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5.5
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5.5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5.5
5.5
Overall Score
26 Aug 24, 18:22
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Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the question but has several grammatical errors and lacks coherence in some parts. Vocabulary usage is adequate but could be more varied, and the ideas need better development and logical flow.
| Overall score | 5.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 28 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 9 | |
| Lexical resource | 10 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
In many countries, governments spend significant resources on promoting national culture through festivals, museums, and public television programs.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of governments promoting national culture?
#Culture
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:280
Paragraphs:4
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
made
progress in making
involvement of national cultures through promotion of festivals, museums and public television programs. While It is being said, it provides greater benefits, it may also potentially cause drawbacks
which I am going to tackle in this essay.It is indeed a great advantage when government supports national
culture
making
it rich and known in terms of resources. When there are alloted
funds for every organisations
, we would expect better outcomes, like a powerful public television programs, that contains relevant news which can make
everyone enjoy watching or a big national event. For instance, Singapore is recognised as the most visited country in South East Asia for having diverse festivals every few months. Therefore, many people
spend holiday
to see and feel of what the country has to offer.However, we cannot deny that having such extravagant federal activities, require
sumptous
money for the viewers. Affluent
people
may often experience the benefits of going to the museum without worrying about the bills
but
for the poor may not be possible as it is expensive.Another disadvantage
for
this is the
worker who receive
the funds may not be able to fully utilise the money well.
For example, rampant news spread that employees in the museum in the Philippines had kept the money for themselves. Furtheremore
, transparencies are
often the problem for trusting financial support.In conclusion, while resource expenditures are one way of giving importance to the traditions for the local
people
making
it familiar for other countries as well, it has also negative effects by
making
it
hard
to attain by less average
people
and involves
unproper
disclosure of financial information.