IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5.5
IELTS Essay Sample Band 5.5
5.5
Overall Score
02 Jul 24, 20:58
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The essay addresses the question but lacks depth in analysis and examples. Grammar and vocabulary are adequate but could be improved for better clarity and precision.
| Overall score | 5.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 6.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 25 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5 | |
| Lexical resource | 11 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
Juvenile justice systems worldwide vary in their approach to handling young offenders, with debates on their effectiveness continually emerging.
Discuss the effectiveness of juvenile justice systems and explore alternative strategies for rehabilitating young offenders.
#Youth Crime
#Discussion
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:318
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
system
around the globe. In many countries, law
enforcement handles young offenders
by placing them in special prisons under the safety and supervision of experienced officers. However
, many people
believe that this approach is outdated, and there are better options, such as
community service. This essay will further elaborate on the efficacy of both of these methods
in rehabilitating underage lawbreakers.To begin with, the traditional juvenile
system
is effective in removing offenders
from society
to protect innocent children
and reconstruct them. A single child
can have a huge influence on others, so it is important to remove any anti-social element to ensure the safety of the rest of children
. Moreover, no parent wants their children
to spend time with the potential law
breakers
, thus the conventional system
to punish
the youth
offenders
is the considered the best method
. In addition to this, current laws
ensure that the youth
in prison are completely protected and emerge as a completely rehabilitated individuals who is
not a threat to the society
.However
, as the society
has progressed, experts believe in the importance of rehabilitating youth
through community service. Many people
urge that imparting moral values and civic sense plays a significant role in reshaping young lawbreakers. Therefore, sentencing them to serve people
in society
, such as
helping the elderly, volunteering in soup kitchens, and managing emergency shelters, helps them connect with people
emotionally on a human level. Therefore, this method
is much better than the traditional system
, as it aids two purposes: communty
service and the reconditioning the youth
offenders
.To conclude, the conventional
system
is a great method
to remove anti-social people
from the public places , such as
schools, and parks. However
, there are alternative methods
that are much better in solving and redevoloping
children
who are in conflict with the law
.