IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5.5
IELTS Essay Sample Band 5.5
5.5
Overall Score
22 Jun 24, 23:02
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Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the question but lacks depth in task response and coherence. Grammar and vocabulary are adequate but contain errors and lack variety. More examples and a clearer thesis statement would improve the essay.
| Overall score | 5.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 6.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 32 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 10 | |
| Lexical resource | 15 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 3 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
In the fast-paced modern world, maintaining cultural traditions can be challenging, especially among younger generations who may feel disconnected from their cultural roots.
What challenges are faced in maintaining cultural traditions and how can these traditions be kept alive among younger generations?
#Culture
#Problem / Solution
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:329
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
following
traditional
values
and traditions is becoming a challenge for younger
generation
, as they feel disconnected from their roots
. This is due to the busy work lifestyle
people
are following
nowadays to achieve successful professional career. Elders
can play vital
role in addressing the issue by teaching and guiding the younger
memebers
of the family about heritage
and culture values
.To begin with, the upcoming
generation
is more worried about their professional success, thus
they divert more time
to work rather than understanding the moral and heritage
upon which their nation and religion are built. Individuals spend their personal time
in offices or running businesses, and as a result
they focus significantly less on elders
teaching about their heritage
. For instance, more people
and children used to go to the churches or temples in the past, but now the number has decreased because people
have other priorities such as work and school. Therefore, due to the busy lifestyle
and other commitments, less time
is spend
connecting with the cultural traditions and learning about rich
history of the religions.To solve this issue, the older
generation
needs to motivate and include younger
people
while celebrating the customs they follow
. A little push is needed to encourage kids start
following
some traditional
practices. For instance, families must sit for dinner together and make the younger
members say a prayer before starting
the meal. In addition to this, old memebers
of the society can start
holding weekly seminars to guide and provide information to the children about the rich heritage
and customs their nation holds. As a result, kids would feel more connected to their roots
, as they get informed about the traditional
values
and customs.To conclude,
modern
lifestyle
has played big
role in disconnecting the youth from the roots
they belong to because today people
have prioritized personal success and growth. However, elders
can solve this problem through motivating and encouraging the young
members through small steps.