IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5.5
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5.5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5.5
5.5
Overall Score
20 Jun 24, 21:29
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Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the question and provides a balanced view, but it contains several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Coherence and cohesion are generally good, but some ideas could be more clearly developed and connected. Vocabulary is adequate but not particularly varied or sophisticated.
| Overall score | 5.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 6.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 31 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 2 | |
| Lexical resource | 22 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 4 | |
| Task response | 3 |
Question
Individual freedoms are a cornerstone of democratic societies. Yet, there is an ongoing debate about the extent to which these freedoms should be exercised, especially when they might impact societal harmony.
Do you agree or disagree that individual freedoms should be restricted to promote societal harmony?
#Society
#Agree / Disagree
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:349
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
In every democratic
nation
, the citizens
have the right
of freedom
in aspects such as speech
and act. The right
to act freely and independently are the indicators of a strong democracy. However, experts believe in restricting
the freedom
to increase the social harmony, as unsocial elements of the society try to misue
the powers provided by the authorities
. I partially agree with this statement, as I believe that a balanced approach is needed to maintain the pillar of democracy and peace between different groups residing in a nation
.On the one side, some
citizens
misuse the freedom
of expression by promoting hate
speech
. Therefore
, it becames
important for the authorities
to control the anti-social elements by restricting
their rights
. For instance, in India, the leaders of the majority ethincities
are always targeting the minorities through hate
speech
, and as a result, there have been many clashes between the different groups, causing unrest among the general people
. Thus, it is the responsibilty
of the government
that individual's autonomy is not resulting
in any sort of hate
towards the minorities.On the other side, regulating and limiting the liberty of the
people
would result
in failure of the democarcy
. In some countries where the rights
of the citizens
are limited, governments
try to control every aspect of the people
. Therefore
, restraining the fundamental freedom
would result
in total central control over the citizens
, thus comprising the basic
principles and autonomy. For instance, the Chinese government
has full control over the population, and people
are not allowed to be vocal against the authorities
. Consequently, the individuals are continously
undermined and harassed by the people
. Therefore
, it is essential that the basic
principles of the democary
are followed and governed to prevent the collaspe
of the basic
human rights
.To conclude, it might look beneficial to restrain the
freedom
of expression of some to promote the general harmony, but this limitation might lead to total failure of a nation
's fundamental independence. A balanced approach should be maintained that establish clear
framework on when and where liberty can be restricted
.