IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 7.5

IELTS Essay Sample Band 7.5

7.5
Overall Score
20 Aug 24, 11:38
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Overall Feedback

The essay is well-structured and addresses both sides of the argument effectively, with a clear conclusion. It demonstrates a strong command of grammar and a wide range of vocabulary, though some points could be more deeply elaborated for a higher score.

Overall score7.5
Grammatical range and accuracy9.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion8.0
Task response7.0
Total Errors15
Grammatical range and accuracy0
Lexical resource9
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response3
Question
Some people think that the government should fund creative people such as artists and musicians due to the benefits they provide to society, other people believe that as they enjoy their work they should have received no government funding.
Discuss both sides.
#Government Spending
#Discussion
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:337
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
In an era characterized by scarce resources, the allocation of
government
funding
has become a contentious issue, particularly in relation to the
creative
arts
. Proponents argue that these
arts
yield substantial societal dividends, whereas critics contend that since
artists
derive intrinsic satisfaction from their work,
public
investment is unwarranted. This essay will explore both perspectives before asserting the indispensability of prioritizing
government
funding
for the
creative
arts
.
Supporters of
public
investment in the
creative
arts
emphasize the multifaceted societal benefits that stem from artistic
endeavors
.
Creative
arts
foster community cohesion, promote cultural dialogue, and enrich education by enhancing critical thinking and
creative
problem-solving skills. For instance,
government
-funded
public
art
projects can galvanize local communities, enhancing the social fabric and nurturing a sense of belonging. Furthermore, the
arts
catalyze
economic growth; studies conducted in various cities reveal that every dollar invested in the
arts
generates significant returns through tourism, cultural tourism, and job creation, underscoring the vital role of
artists
in economic sustainability.
Conversely, detractors assert that
artists
often find intrinsic joy in their pursuits, rendering external financial support superfluous. They argue that many
artists
thrive in their
creative
processes regardless of
government
backing. However, this viewpoint overlooks the broader implications of
art
on society. While it is true that
artists
may feel fulfilled by their craft,
public
funding
can elevate artistic expression to a broader audience, making
art
accessible to all, not just the affluent elite. Additionally, the argument fails to consider the sacrifices many
artists
make to pursue their passion, often resulting in financial instability. Therefore, support from
governments
can facilitate artistic engagement and ensure that creativity continues to flourish within society.
In conclusion, while it is acknowledged that
artists
may derive personal satisfaction from their work, the broader benefits of investing in the
creative
arts
are compelling.
Government
funding
should prioritize the
arts
not only for their intrinsic value but also for their role in fostering community, driving economic growth, and ensuring that
art
remains an accessible and integral component of our society.