IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 7.5

IELTS Essay Sample Band 7.5

7.5
Overall Score
20 Aug 24, 11:41
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Overall Feedback

The essay is well-structured and addresses both sides of the argument effectively, with a clear personal opinion. It demonstrates a wide range of vocabulary and grammatical accuracy, though some points could be more deeply elaborated for a higher score.

Overall score7.5
Grammatical range and accuracy9.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion8.0
Task response7.0
Total Errors13
Grammatical range and accuracy0
Lexical resource7
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response3
Question
Some people think that the government should fund creative people such as artists and musicians due to the benefits they provide to society, other people believe that as they enjoy their work they should have received no government funding.
Discuss both sides.
#Government Spending
#Discussion
Submitted Answer
English:US English
Words:340
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
In an era characterized by scarce resources, the allocation of
government
funding
has become a contentious issue, particularly regarding the
creative
arts
. Proponents assert that these
arts
provide indispensable societal benefits, while critics argue that since
artists
derive inherent satisfaction from their work, public investment is unwarranted. This essay will explore both perspectives before asserting the necessity of prioritizing
government
funding
for the
creative
arts
.
Supporters of
government
funding
emphasize the multifaceted societal advantages that stem from artistic endeavors.
Creative
arts
foster social cohesion, cultural discourse, and cognitive enrichment by enhancing critical thinking skills. For instance,
government
-funded public
art
projects can galvanize local communities, fortifying the social fabric and nurturing a sense of belonging. Moreover, the
arts
are
economic
catalysts; studies have shown that investments in the
arts
yield substantial returns through tourism and job creation, underscoring the vital role of
artists
in
economic
sustainability. Thus, the
arts
are not merely aesthetic endeavors but also pivotal contributors to societal well-being and
economic
growth.
Conversely, detractors posit that
artists
often derive intrinsic joy from their pursuits, rendering external financial support superfluous. They argue that many
artists
thrive in their
creative
processes regardless of
government
backing. However, this viewpoint myopically overlooks the broader implications of
art
on society. While it is true that
artists
may feel fulfilled by their craft, public
funding
can amplify artistic expression to broader audiences, ensuring that
art
is accessible to everyone, not just those who can afford it. Additionally, this argument fails to consider the precarious financial situations many
artists
endure to pursue their passion. Therefore, support from
governments
can facilitate artistic engagement and ensure that
creative
innovation continues to flourish within society.
In conclusion, while it is acknowledged that
artists
may derive personal satisfaction from their work, the broader benefits of investing in the
creative
arts
are compelling.
Government
funding
should prioritize the
arts
not only for their intrinsic value but also for their role in fostering community, driving
economic
growth, and ensuring that
art
remains an accessible and integral component of our society.