IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5.5
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5.5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5.5
5.5
Overall Score
09 Oct 24, 16:05
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Overall Feedback
The essay presents a clear opinion against long working hours, but grammatical errors and informal language affect clarity. Ideas are relevant but need more development and better cohesion for improved readability.
| Overall score | 5.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 36 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 12 | |
| Lexical resource | 16 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 4 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
In many industries, there is a common belief that working long hours is essential for career advancement, despite potential negative effects on productivity and personal life.
Do you agree or disagree that the benefits of working long hours outweigh the negatives?
#Work
#Agree / Disagree
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:285
Paragraphs:5
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Missing Linking Devices
Thesis Statement
of
working for an extended hours
is crucial
factor for succesful
career
. I'm
completely
disagree
with this perception. it
may carry some negative impacts on indivudual
's personal life
and health for two main reasons.Firstly,
human
body has a certain limitation that can't
be exceeded, and it needs sufficient
amount of recover. If people push themselves to go beyond boundaries, they will be more likely to get ovewhelmed
by the pressure and consequently end up with mentally drained. For example, Accountants are usually tend
to work for excessive hours due to the demand from a particular company and a study shows that their job satisfaction is below average. In fact, prioritizing the overall mental and physical health can indeed lead to much better outcome than putting unneccesary
spare efforts.Secondly, people have their own private
life
as well as responsibilities and duties as a social member, such as family member and citizen. Their life
cannot be exclusively focused on jobs, careers
, and success. Wheter
they are employee
or employer, they possess the things to fulfill and accomplish besides career
oriented aspects. For instance, Men are responsible for family as a father who is supposed to care for their family and provide needs.Moreover,
life
isn't
meant to be only about career
. It is supposed to be wealthy in a
emotional, physical and spiritual way. Similarily
, it must involve diverse quality.In conclusion, there is
competion
among
the job market and modern society demands workers to work harder. But, that doesn't
necessarily mean they must surpass the innate limitation. Instead, prioritizing work-life
balance is the ideal way to succeed.