IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 5
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 5
5.0
Overall Score
24 Mar 25, 11:58
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Overall Feedback
The essay addresses the task but lacks depth in discussing both benefits and risks, with limited examples and analysis. Grammar and vocabulary need improvement, as there are several errors and informal expressions that affect clarity and coherence.
| Overall score | 5.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 5.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 5.0 | |
| Task response | 5.0 |
| Total Errors | 30 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 12 | |
| Lexical resource | 10 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 4 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Writing Task
#Technology
#Discussion
Technology has significantly transformed healthcare, improving diagnostics and patient care. Nonetheless, these advancements come with concerns about the privacy and security of patient data.
Discuss the benefits and risks of using technology in healthcare.
Submitted Answer
Words261|Paragraphs3
English:
Global Issues:
Paragraph Count Requirement
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Paragraph 1 Issues:
Thesis Statement
technology
. Technology
has transformed the healthcare sector, improving diagnostics and patient care. However, there have been some concerns related to privacy and security of patient's data.Technology
has brought various benefits in the healthcare sector. It has improved the overall diagnostic system and made it hassle-free for the patients. AI has been incoporated
in medical
which has allowed patients to diagnose them within seconds throught
GPT and learn about medicines at home. Moreover, Robotics surgeries have been taken place which are helping
doctors nowadays. We have seen use of mobile apps that are helping
people
to book there appointments and get better medical facilities at home. Sharing
your information help
you to connect to different people
and
it can help
you in getting better treatment. For example, if you are in search of blood group , you can share
your details over the internet and people
can connect with you in seconds and blood can be arranged.People
nowdays
prefer to share
there
personal details, disease to get treatement
through AI. However, this is more convenient but
it raise
the risk of personal data being shared
over the internet. People
accounts get hacked and security breach is
one of main
concerns of people
. In my opinion, everything comes with its benefits and drawbacks. The future is all about new advancements in technology
Soon it will be incorporated in every sector, therefore
we must adopt new changes and take benefit from them which can make our lives easier.