IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6

IELTS Essay Sample Band 6

6.0
Overall Score
28 Jul 24, 13:35
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The essay addresses the question but lacks depth in discussing both advantages and disadvantages. Grammar and vocabulary are adequate but contain errors and lack variety. Coherence and cohesion are present but could be improved with better transitions and structure.

Overall score6.0
Grammatical range and accuracy6.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors29
Grammatical range and accuracy7
Lexical resource15
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response4
Question
Vegetarian diets are known for their health benefits and environmental advantages, but they can also pose challenges in terms of nutritional balance.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of adopting a vegetarian diet.
#Health
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Submitted Answer
English:US English
Words:302
Paragraphs:4
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
Health benefits and environmental advantages are important factors which make up a
diet
. There are several
diet
plans that
benefits
your
health
such as, the vegetarian
diet
. In addition, people follow the vegetarian
diet
because of its positive environmental outcomes. Although it
has
many
benefits, the vegetarian
diet
also has difficulties in achieving nutritional balance. I will be discussing the advantages and disadvantages of adopting a
vegtarian
diet
.
The
diet
plan where people consume vegetables rather than
animal based
foods is known as the vegetarian
diet
. The health benefits of the vegetarian diet include
decreased
fat percentage, lowered
cholestrol
levels, and
decreased
rate of cardiovascular diseases. Most
animal based
foods contain high fat content, which increases cholesterol levels. Study
show
that higher cholesterol levels increase the risk of heart diseases. Another factor that lets
many
people stick to the vegetarian
diet
because of the environmental conditions for example, when any of the
animal based
food contains diseases due to climate change, or bad environment this spreads
dieases
into our
body
.
The problem that
many
face
when doing the vegetarian
diet
is the lack of nutritional
balance
which leads to several health issues. In addition, not feeding your
body
with a good amount of protein would lead to the loss of water in your
body
then your hormones are being damaged. Our
bodies
are like a machine that has
many
different processes if it is not fed by good nutrition
mostly every
part of this machine would break apart
, and you
will have experience bad health problems
In conclusion, The advantages of adopting the vegetarian
diet
include
decreased
fat percentage, lowered cholesterol, and
decreased
rate of heart problems. Despite, the disadvantages, there is evidence of a lack in nutritional balance. Therefore, when choosing to follow the vegetarian diet, one should consider the risks.