IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6
IELTS Essay Sample Band 6
6.0
Overall Score
28 Jul 24, 11:39
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Overall Feedback
The essay provides a balanced view on globalisation's impact on job opportunities, but it contains grammatical errors and lacks coherence in some parts. Improved sentence structure and clearer transitions would enhance readability and cohesion.
| Overall score | 6.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 5.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 7.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 6.0 | |
| Task response | 6.0 |
| Total Errors | 20 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 8 | |
| Lexical resource | 5 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 3 | |
| Task response | 4 |
Question
Globalisation is often credited with the creation of job opportunities through new markets and investments. Conversely, it is blamed for job displacements due to companies relocating their operations to countries with cheaper labor.
Do you agree or disagree that globalisation creates more job opportunities than it displaces?
#Globalisation
#Agree / Disagree
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:274
Paragraphs:5
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
has
been fruitful debates in the field of sociology, human resources, and business when it comes to globalisation and paradigm shifts in labour. From my point of view
, I agrees
that globalisation creates more career opportunities in general, but also hinder
job
development in certain industries.To begin with, globalisation aids encounters and collaborations across countries and sectors. It encourages corporate agendas to expand their coverage of sales and services from local to global, emphasising the need of
multi-lingual
talents who are able to adapt to different cultures. This particularly benefited sectors like finance, marketing, business, and even law.Moreover, with the advancement of technology, a lot of innovative businesses and roles are created, thus providing more career opportunities and development trends.
Jobs
that have never been imagined before, such as digital nomad, are now popular choices for people who enjoys
travelling around and working in flexible schedule.However, I acknowledge the drawbacks that brought about to certain areas due to globalisation. A lot of menial work, for instance
customoer
support and industrial labour, are shifted to the Global South for lower expenses. People living in the Global North with lower educational background may lost
their job
. Moreover, some traditional industries, especially those related indigenous
cultures, may also be vanished or replaced by modern creations.Although it is believed that globalisation has put forward more
job
sources, it also left behind some negative consequences to
particular sectors. However, this can be deliberated by providing continuous learning opportunities for the unemployed and preserving the cultural heritages.