IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 7.5

IELTS Essay Sample Band 7.5

7.5
Overall Score
19 Jul 24, 20:22
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The essay effectively addresses the role of globalisation in education and healthcare, demonstrating strong grammar and vocabulary usage. However, the development of ideas could be more comprehensive, and the logical flow can be slightly improved for better coherence.

Overall score7.5
Grammatical range and accuracy9.0
Lexical resource7.0
Coherence & cohesion7.0
Task response7.0
Total Errors11
Grammatical range and accuracy0
Lexical resource4
Coherence & cohesion4
Task response3
Question
Globalisation has transformed various sectors, including education and healthcare, affecting accessibility and quality.
What role does globalisation play in shaping the sectors of education and healthcare?
#Globalisation
#Direct Question
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:278
Paragraphs:6
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Globalisation has profoundly impacted various sectors, notably
education
and
healthcare
, influencing both accessibility and quality. This essay explores how globalisation shapes these vital areas, enhancing opportunities while presenting new
challenges
.
In
education
, globalisation has broadened access to knowledge and learning resources. The proliferation of online platforms and international collaboration among educational institutions has enabled students to benefit from diverse curricula and teaching methodologies. For instance, online courses and virtual classrooms allow students from remote or underprivileged areas to receive quality
education
previously inaccessible. Moreover, globalisation has facilitated the exchange of ideas and best practices, encouraging educational reforms and innovations that enhance learning outcomes.
However, globalisation also presents
challenges
in
education
. The dominance of certain languages and cultures in global
education
systems can marginalise local traditions and knowledge. Additionally, the digital divide remains a significant barrier, as not all students have equal access to technology and the internet, exacerbating educational inequalities.
Missing Linking Devices
In
healthcare
, globalisation has led to significant improvements in medical research, technology, and treatments. Cross-border collaborations have accelerated the development of vaccines and medical breakthroughs, enhancing global health outcomes. Telemedicine and international partnerships have improved
healthcare
accessibility, particularly in underserved regions, by providing remote consultations and specialised care.
Nevertheless, globalisation in
healthcare
also brings
challenges
. The global movement of
healthcare
professionals can lead to brain drain in developing countries, weakening their
healthcare
systems. Additionally, the spread of diseases across borders requires robust international cooperation and preparedness to prevent and manage pandemics effectively.
In conclusion, globalisation plays a crucial role in shaping
education
and
healthcare
, offering opportunities for enhanced accessibility and quality. However, it also necessitates addressing the accompanying
challenges
to ensure equitable and inclusive benefits for all.