IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 7.5
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 7.5 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 7.5
7.5
Overall Score
09 Dec 24, 13:25
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Overall Feedback
The essay effectively addresses the task, demonstrating a strong understanding of the relationship between education and youth crime. It uses a wide range of vocabulary and complex grammatical structures accurately, though further development of ideas with specific examples could enhance clarity and depth.
| Overall score | 7.5 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 9.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 6.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 8.0 | |
| Task response | 7.0 |
| Total Errors | 13 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 0 | |
| Lexical resource | 8 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 2 | |
| Task response | 3 |
Question
Education plays a critical role in shaping the future of young individuals and potentially their inclination towards criminal behavior.
Discuss the relationship between educational opportunities and youth crime, and suggest how improving education could reduce such crimes.
#Youth Crime
#Discussion
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:271
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Education
plays a pivotal role in shaping the future of young
individuals and can significantly influence their propensity towards criminal
behavior
. The relationship between educational
opportunities and youth
crime
is multifaceted, as access to quality education
can either serve as a protective factor against delinquency or, conversely, lack of educational
resources can exacerbate the risk of engaging in criminal
activities.Firstly, children who are not provided with adequate
educational
opportunities often find themselves in environments that are conducive to crime
. Limited access to quality schools, extracurricular activities, and supportive teachers may lead to academic failure, low self-esteem, and ultimately a feeling of disenchantment with society. This can drive some youths
to seek validation or financial gain through illegal means. Research has consistently shown that lower educational
attainment is correlated with higher crime
rates among young
people, suggesting that education
is a crucial element in youth
rehabilitation and crime
prevention.To mitigate
youth
crime
, it is essential to focus on improving education
systems. Investing in quality education
, particularly in underprivileged areas, can help reduce crime
by providing young
individuals with the skills and knowledge needed to pursue legitimate career paths. Implementing mentorship programs and after-school initiatives can also foster a sense of community and belonging, steering youth
away from criminal
influences.In conclusion, enhancing
educational
opportunities presents a viable strategy to reduce youth
crime
. By prioritizing education
, society can empower young
individuals, offering them the tools necessary to choose constructive paths in life rather than resorting to criminal
activities. Thus, education
stands as a cornerstone in breaking the cycle of crime
and fostering a secure future for the next generation.