IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 5.5

IELTS Essay Sample Band 5.5

5.5
Overall Score
30 Jul 24, 11:29
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Overall Feedback

The essay addresses the topic but contains numerous grammatical errors and lacks coherence. Vocabulary usage is limited and repetitive, and the ideas are not fully developed or logically organized.

Overall score5.5
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource5.0
Coherence & cohesion5.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors32
Grammatical range and accuracy11
Lexical resource12
Coherence & cohesion4
Task response5
Question
Health education is an essential aspect of community health.
Do you agree or disagree?
#Health
#Agree / Disagree
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:196
Paragraphs:3
Word Count Requirement
Paragraph Count Requirement
Formality
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
Educating
people
about health has been becoming the crucial step of development
the
community health. I fully support this idea because I believe that the primary aspect of community health can be begun
from
giving
advices
both formal and informal education.
Learning about health will bring
people
to improve their
practice
especially regarding with daily diet. They tend to
aplicate
their knowledge to
mantain
their body stay healthy
and
it will contribute
in
increasing public
awarness
. For instance, a person who has learned about the importance of
heathy
life will try to do
excersice
and eat safety food. By this action, it will encourage other
people
around that person to do the same way and from here, the public health will be built naturally. It happens because
people
usually imitate
others
behavior
so the rising number of
people
who aware
with
their health can also support others in their environment.
In addition,
eduacate
about healthy life to the citizen will prevent
people
from bad
behavior
. For example, after giving advice about health,
people
will discourage themselves to
eat
unhealthy food such as
junkfood
and food with high fat or sugar. Day by day,
people
will
avo