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IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 6

IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 6

6.0
Overall Score
13 Mar 25, 13:30
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Overall Feedback

The essay effectively addresses the task with clear arguments and examples, but contains several grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. Improved coherence and a more varied vocabulary would enhance the overall quality.
Overall score6.0
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response7.0
Total Errors26
Grammatical range and accuracy7
Lexical resource10
Coherence & cohesion5
Task response4

Writing Task

#Society
#Problem / Solution
Crime is a persistent concern in many societies, impacting the sense of safety and community life.
What are the principal reasons for high crime rates in some communities, and how can these rates be reduced?

Submitted Answer

Words292|Paragraphs7
English:UK English
Global Issues:
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Paragraph 1 Issues:
Thesis Statement
Crime
remains a serious concern in many societies, affecting public safety and overall
community
well-being. While some areas experience relatively low
crime
rates, others struggle with persistent criminal activity.
this
essay will
discusss
the primary causes of high
crime
rates and
proposse
effective measures to reduce them.
One major cause of
crime
is poverty and unemployment. When individuals lack stable income sources, they may resort to illegal activities such as theft, drug
trafikking
, or fraud, to survive. For example, in economically
dissadvantaged
neighborhoods
, young people often engage in gang-related
crimes
due to a lack of job opportunities. Additionally, lack of education plays a significant role, as those without proper schooling have limited career prospects and
may may
turn to
crime
as a means of survival. Another contributing factor is a weak law enforcement and judicial inefficiency.
in
some
communities
, police corruption or insufficient legal action allows criminals to act with impunity, creating an environment where
crime
thrives.
Paragraph 3 Issues:
Missing Linking Devices
To address these issues, governments must invest in education and employment programs.
Paragraph 4 Issues:
Missing Linking Devices
Providing free vocational training and creating more job opportunities can help individuals secure legal and
stablr
incomes, reducing the incentive to engage in
crime
.
Furthermore, strengthening law enforcement and judicial systems is crucial.
increasing
police presence, ensuring fair legal proceedings, and implementing stricter penalties for serious
crime
can act as
a strong deterrents
.
Additionally,
community
engagement programs, such as mentorship initiatives for at-risk youth and rehabilitation programs for offenders, can help reintegrate individuals into society and prevent
reoffending
.
in conclusion, high
crime
rates are often driven by poverty, lack of education, and weak law enforcement. However, by improving economic opportunities, reinforcing the justice systems, and promoting
community
-based initiatives, societies can significantly reduce
crime
and create safer environments for all.

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