IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 6

IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 6 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 6

6.0
Overall Score
23 Sept 24, 19:27
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The essay addresses the question but lacks clarity and coherence in some parts. Grammar and vocabulary usage are adequate but could be improved for better readability and precision.
Overall score6.0
Grammatical range and accuracy5.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response6.0
Total Errors22
Grammatical range and accuracy6
Lexical resource9
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response4
Question
In many countries, governments spend significant resources on promoting national culture through festivals, museums, and public television programs.
What are the advantages and disadvantages of governments promoting national culture?
#Culture
#Advantage / Disadvantage
Submitted Answer
English:UK English
Words:291
Paragraphs:4
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
Thesis Statement
Authorities of a numerous amount of
countries
are
known to advertise national cultural sites via television shows, festivals, and museums, spending a lot of
money
. Although spent finances could be
more
concentrated on solving problems and meeting citizens' needs, this focus on promotion can acquire people
more
about diverse cultures and develop
tourism
.
Budget
money
is considered to be used for creating new solutions. Instead of waiting for global \
hardles
to emerge, government can pan and make decisions to cope with a certain issue step-by-step. This might prevent a future crisis and even lead to thriving spheres. For example, if enough amount of
money
has
been granted on
virusology
, Kazakhstan would not face a deficiency of
virusologists
now. Furthermore, modern advancements could be made by now, responding to the people's needs. These decisions would be
more
rational in comparison with spending resources on advertisement.
Nevertheless, it is known that recognisability is crucial for
countries
'
tourism
and culture. By promoting the
mother land
, people from all over the world are encouraged to visit a specific national destination. This attraction of sightseers improves the
tourism
sector, following by a higher income and cultural knowledge. For instance,
5th
"Nomad Games" festival, which had been organized this autumn in Astana, has increased the number of visitors in Kazakhstan. This global event made
country
more
known on international arena and brought hundred thousand dollars in
tourism
.
In conclusion, governments are promoting national features by spending an enormous amount of
money
on television programs, local events and cultural sites. While it might be considered as irrational due to
possibility
to find solutions and respond
on
citizens' demands, it is also essential for the development of the
tourism
and recognition of
countries
on international level.

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