IELTS Essay Checker - Sample Band 7
IELTS Writing Task 2 Sample Band 7 | IELTS Essay Sample Band 7
7.0
Overall Score
20 Feb 25, 14:53
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Overall Feedback
The essay provides a balanced discussion of both views and includes a personal opinion, but contains some grammatical errors and lacks a wide range of vocabulary. Coherence and cohesion are generally good, but the essay could benefit from more varied sentence structures and clearer transitions between ideas.
| Overall score | 7.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 7.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 6.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 7.0 | |
| Task response | 7.0 |
| Total Errors | 22 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 3 | |
| Lexical resource | 13 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 3 | |
| Task response | 3 |
Writing Task
#Health
#Discussion
Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Submitted Answer
Words271|Paragraphs4
English:
Global Issues:
Task Response
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Ideas Development
Logical Flow
An increasing number of
people
believe that creating more sports facilities is the optimal method to promote a healthy
society. In my opinion, while this is definitely beneficial, other measures, such as health education and limiting the fast
food
expansion are equally important to achieve that goal.Having extra places to
workout
is a positive move because it offers more opportunities to individuals to exercise. For a long time, people
have been demotivated to exercise regularly as gyms and workout facilities have not been accessible or affordable to everybody. Therefore, the abundance of sports places in parks and public areas would encourage more people
to consider exercising and taking care of their bodies.However,
others methods
are neccesary
in order to maintain the health of the public. Firstly, health education on TV and social media would be advatageous
as it results in increasing awarness
of people
about the dangers of sedentery
life-style. Not only that, it would also promote the importance of a healthy
diet amongst
audience. For instance, people
would be more motivated to lead a healthy
life when they are intoduced
to the heart and brain diseases that can affect their health. Moreover, goverments
should invest some effort into decreasing the fast
food
expansion. Introducing restrictions on existing shops and restaurants, such as imposing extra taxes, would significantly deter people
from investing in the fast
food
industry. Should these ideas be implemented, they can help creating
a healthy
society over the years.In conclusion, although increasing the number of sports areas should be effective in improving public health, advocacy and limiting
fast
food
consumption are required as well.