IELTS Writing Academic Checker - Sample Band 6

IELTS Writing Task 1 Sample Band 6 | IELTS Writing Academic Report Sample Band 6 (Academic Training)

6.0
Overall Score
06 Apr 25, 14:21
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Overall Feedback

The response provides a general overview of the trends in mobile e-commerce sales but lacks precision in data interpretation and contains grammatical errors. Improved coherence and more accurate data referencing would enhance the overall quality.
Overall score6.0
Grammatical range and accuracy6.0
Lexical resource6.0
Coherence & cohesion6.0
Task response5.0
Total Errors12
Grammatical range and accuracy3
Lexical resource4
Coherence & cohesion3
Task response2

Writing Task

#Retail and E-commerce
#Line Chart
Discuss the trends in mobile e-commerce sales for South Korea, India, France, and Mexico from 2011 to 2021.
Identify the overall trend for each country.
Highlight any periods of significant growth or decline.
Compare the trends and suggest reasons for any notable differences.

Submitted Answer

Words177|Paragraphs4
English:UK English
Global Issues:
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Logical Flow
Bullet Point Missing or Incomplete
The graph illustrates fluctuation of number of
online
mobile
sales in South Korea, India, France and Mexico between 2011 and 2021.
Overall, the
online
sales of
mobile
phones over the period given has increased in every country. India was lead the
online
sales at the beginning of the 2021 which number of sales were at 500 items, while France was the lowest
online
seller was at 200 items in 2021.
At the start of the period, number of sales were at
0-50
items in each country, while South Korea was the highest seller in that time and the lowest seller was Mexico. Amount of
mobile
phones sales in India surpassed France in 2014 and South Korea in 2020, while significant growth of the sales throughout the period achieved by India.
With regard to the amount of sales in France, slightly increased up to 200 items in 2021, while Mexico achieved moderate growth between 2011 and 2017 until surpassed the France.
After that
it increased steadily in subsequent years until it sold 300
mobile
phones in 2021.

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