IELTS Writing Academic Checker - Sample Band 8
IELTS Writing Task 1 Sample Band 8 | IELTS Writing Academic Report Sample Band 8 (Academic Training)
8.0
Overall Score
20 Oct 24, 12:17
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Overall Feedback
The response effectively describes the bar chart, accurately reflecting the data and trends across the four cities. The use of varied vocabulary and grammatical structures enhances clarity, though minor improvements in cohesion could further strengthen the logical flow.
| Overall score | 8.0 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 8.0 | |
| Lexical resource | 8.0 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 8.0 | |
| Task response | 8.0 |
| Total Errors | 6 | |
| Grammatical range and accuracy | 1 | |
| Lexical resource | 1 | |
| Coherence & cohesion | 3 | |
| Task response | 1 |
Question
Describe the bar chart showing the percentage of people participating in various fitness activities in four different cities.
Identify the city with the highest participation in each activity.
Discuss any noticeable trends or patterns.
Compare and contrast the participation rates between the cities.
#Health and Fitness
#Bar Chart
Submitted Answer
English:
Words:232
Paragraphs:6
Readability
Coherence
Cohesion
Vocabulary Usage
Grammar Range
Logical Flow
The bar chart displays the percentage of individuals engaging in different fitness activities—Running, Swimming, Cycling, and Yoga—in four cities: New York, London, Tokyo, and Sydney.
Overall, the data reveals significant variations in participation trends among the cities, with some activities notably surpassing others. Running was particularly prominent, accounting for nearly 40% in Tokyo, the highest engagement rate among participants, while it was less popular in Sydney, where it reached about 23%, the lowest among the four cities.
Swimming closely followed, with participation rates around 30% in Sydney, 25% in Tokyo, and 20% in New York, securing second place in those three cities. However, in London, Swimming ranked third, falling behind Cycling by a narrow margin of about 5%.
In the Cycling category, Sydney excelled with nearly 30% participation, outpacing London, Tokyo, and New York. Tokyo held the third position with approximately 18%, exceeding New York by just 3%.
Yoga ranked fourth in participation across New York, London, and Tokyo, with figures of 15% in Tokyo, 12% in New York, and 10% in London, while Sydney was an exception in this regard.
In conclusion, fitness participation varies significantly across these four cities, with activities like Yoga and Cycling showing notably lower engagement. This emphasizes the vital role of Swimming and Running in overall fitness participation. Understanding these trends is crucial for effective sports program management, although future participation patterns remain unpredictable.